happy chinese new year! i didn’t even know it was going to be the year of the horse, but i went to duane reade to shop for overpriced valentine’s day cards and saw, to my surprise, chinese new year cards with horses on them. maybe this means i’ll be lucky and/or prosperous this year. but as they say, we “make our own luck.” so here’s to working hard this year, to being dauntless and taking risks (can you tell i’ve been reading divergent?), to growing as best as i can into someone i’m proud to be.
it’s kind of weird starting a new blog, but xanga shut down a while back and forced me to move on from the blog of my pre-teen/teenage angst. that was probably good for me, because the overdramatic tendencies of my youth are pretty cringeworthy – so really, xanga did us all a favor. it feels like i’ve graduated to “grown-up” xanga by creating a wordpress blog. maybe one day i’ll start capitalizing the first letter of every word like an adult – but until then, laziness still prevails.
anyway, since this is my first blog post, i want to explain the meaning behind the title. the past year and a half in new york has been an interesting year and a half. as i explored and tried to navigate my way around a new city, i found myself getting wrapped up in life around me – the people, the job, the money, the activities – all things that are so ever-present and so in-my-face, all the time. it was quite easy to feel lost in it all, and i could feel myself going through the motions of day-to-day life, letting all the little things get to me – for better or for worse, they got to me either way. it wasn’t until i started taking the time to pause, to step away from it all, to have those two-to-three hour conversations with the best of my friends that i felt like i could truly remember what happiness meant to me. i’m ever so grateful to the best family and friends in the world for driving me to be my best, for encouraging me to pursue meaning instead of money, long-term joy instead of short-term satisfaction.
with that knowledge in mind, i’ve been on a constant quest to find out what it is that makes that makes life meaningful. so there it is: “seeking something splendid.” as soon as i knew i needed a blog title, i turned of course to my all-time favorite book, little women. i came across this little quote:
“I want to do something splendid before I go into my castle, something heroic or wonderful that won’t be forgotten after I’m dead. I don’t know what, but I’m on the watch for it, and mean to astonish you all some day.” (jo continues this quote by saying she wants to write books and get rich and famous, but we’re going to ignore that part for the purposes of this blog).
like jo, i don’t know what “something splendid” is. but i want to find out, and i want to work towards it. and it should be heroic, and wonderful, and not forgotten after i’m dead – not because it has to be some crazy, large-scale, martyrdom act, but because anything i seek is, i hope, ultimately rooted in the beauty that is helping others. (i also don’t know what her castle is, but i hope mine is something like being able to eat unlimited food without becoming unhealthy and also being surrounded by rainbows and pillow pets). for a long time, i waited for success to come to me, but i’ve realized that i don’t even know what success is. for now, though, i know that to help others is heroic, and it’s wonderful, and won’t be forgotten after i’m dead (unless everyone i get to help dies before me, which would be really quite weird).
so walk with me, learn with me. encourage me please – come with me on my journey of seeking something splendid!